Resist Read online

  My skin tingles at the thought of other positions. How it would feel… “I think four times over the span of a few hours is pretty amazing.”

  “Four and a half,” he corrects.

  “Half?”

  “The elevator half counts.”

  I laugh. “I suppose it does. Okay, the four and a half times were pretty amazing.”

  “They were. Pretty fucking amazing.”

  I trace my fingers over his chest absently as his fingers caress my back. I lift up my head and press a kiss to his lips. “Thank you.”

  “For what?”

  “Tonight.”

  “No need to thank me. It was my pleasure.”

  “I don’t want you to think that I don’t appreciate it, because—”

  “Allegra,” he interrupts, touching his forefinger to my lips. “Trust me, you don’t need to say anything. I would have been willing with or without your mission.”

  He skims his fingertips along the edge of my jaw, his eyes following where his fingers trace. There’s a tingling in my chest that seems to flutter and bounce off my ribcage. The desire seeps into my skin wherever he touches. His eyes flicker to mine suddenly. The way he watches me so lovingly, a wonderful feeling emerges from within. I haven’t felt this way since…since…

  Since right before I first locked that vault.

  Damn it. Damn it, damn it, damn it! I thought I could distance myself enough from one night and come out indifferent and renewed. Instead, I’m longing to hang on and never let go. How could I have allowed myself to be ignorant of the way he stirs feelings of forever in me? There’s an inconsistency in him. His saccharine words and the longing in his eyes are a contradiction that could break me.

  My chest tightens. I don’t know what to do. Part of me wants to stay, spend the night, and wake up next to this wonderful man. The other part of me wants to get the hell out of here before any damage can be done. I’m dangerously close to crossing a line that I can’t uncross without consequences. Emotional consequences.

  “Allegra?” His voice breaks me out of my trance.

  I meet his curious eyes. “Yes?”

  “Did I lose you there for a second?”

  “It’s the exhaustion, I think.” I half smile to hide the truth.

  His hand brushes my hair back. “It’s okay. We can sleep. We should sleep.”

  “Okay,” I say with a nod. I lean in and press my lips to his in a chaste kiss. “Goodnight.”

  He laughs lightly. “That’s all you’ve got?” Before I can respond, he slides his fingers into my hair and draws me to him. Then his lips touch mine, gentle and tender. Our lips move together harmoniously, as if they are lost in a song only they can sing.

  When the kiss breaks, I feel like I ran a marathon. We barely kissed—there wasn’t even any tongue. Yet, he took my breath away. Now that’s talent.

  He presses his lips to my forehead, then whispers, “Goodnight, Allegra.”

  I lay my head back on his chest. “Goodnight, Devlin.”

  I relax into the warmth of his body, willing sleep to rest upon my head, but it won’t. As the seconds turn into minutes, I follow his steady breathing until it fades and he’s sleeping. I watch his chest move slowly up and down, my hand drawing circles, hoping that sleep will be near for me, too. But it’s to no avail.

  After giving full control over to my body in the elevator, my brain has decided to come out and play, and is now on overdrive. What am I doing? How did I get to this place? This is what I wanted: a night of passion. I don’t regret this, not for a second. Not simply due to how spectacular it felt—which was pretty damn spectacular—but because I needed to know. It has been a question in my subconscious since last year. I could speculate for hours on end about why I shouldn’t have, but I believe that if I didn’t I would have regretted that instead. There’s more frustration in not doing something than doing it in the end.

  Still, there are feelings coming over me, strange ones. I wish I could put a finger on them—on the flutter in my heart and stomach. It’s almost like both euphoria and sadness. I don’t like it one bit because it scares me. It reminds me of the past, and I’m not a fan of the past so much.

  Stupid brain. How dare you start working now? Why did you allow my body to do things that went straight to my heart? They’re all about action and emotion; they can’t think like you can. I squeeze my eyes shut. Maybe this was a bad idea after all. Who knew a one-night stand could fuck with your head so much?

  I untangle myself from his embrace, mindful of the fact that the last thing I need right now is him waking up. I sit on the bed next to him and just look at him. Take in his features, his luscious lips and that sexy stubble. I could easily be with him; he proved to me that we could have a really good time. Part of me wants to stay, really I do, but I already know it would be a glorious mistake. It would be fun at first, like a honeymoon, but it would crash and burn in no time. Sexual chemistry can only go so far in a relationship. I shake my head. Why does my mind keep returning to possibilities that could never happen?

  What are we going to say to each other tomorrow? It just feels like it’s going to be all sorts of holy awkward and I don’t want to live through that. Maybe I don’t have to. I need to get out of here before I have an emotional breakdown on the floor in the fetal position.

  Slipping out from under the covers, I place my feet on the floor quietly. I glance over to make sure I haven’t stirred him from his slumber. He’s still fast asleep. I breathe a sigh of relief. Tiptoeing across the plush carpet, I gather up my clothes and dress myself. All I can find is my dress, bra, and stockings. Where did my underwear—

  Oh. Right… Damn it. Where are Devlin’s pants? I bite my lips and scan the floor. Just when I find them, he stirs and turns to his side, facing me. I freeze, holding my breath. Please don’t wake up. After a minute with no movement on his part, I decide my best bet is to escape while I can, panties or no panties. It wouldn’t be the first time I’ve gone commando. Plus, it’s not like I can’t make a trip back to Victoria’s Secret when I get back home.

  I creep across the floor, picking up my clutch and heels. I don’t bother to put on my heels. With one final glance back to Devlin, I sneak out the door. On the way back to my room, I have a realization. I could go to sleep in my hotel bed, wake up in the morning, and head back to the airport with Jack tomorrow afternoon. But if I do that, Devlin will still be at the hotel and I may run into him. Scratch that, I will run into him. He and Jack will want to say goodbye. What’s worse than walking out on a one-night stand? Walking out on a one-night stand and running into said one-night stand the next morning.

  So what do I do? The only thing that makes sense. Pack all my bags and check out of the hotel.

  As I stand on the curb waving my hand for the closest taxi, I feel a pang of unease in my chest, like I am making a mistake, like I should stay. But I can’t. I do what I can to keep my feelings in check. I escape. I run. Overly dramatic much? Perhaps. But it’s the only way I’ve been able to survive since closing the vault.

  I take one last look at the hotel and the buildings surrounding it and let out a sigh. “Goodbye, New York,” I whisper. “Hello, next chapter.”

  THE END

  ####

  Allegra and Devlin’s story doesn’t end here! Be sure to watch for Longing, the sequel to Resist, coming out late 2014.

  Acknowledgements

  Enormous thank yous…To Marie for the cover, beta reading, and formatting. To Stephanie for editing. To Rachael and Susan for beta reading. To R.W. for listening to me read Resist out loud and essentially being my alpha reader, er, listener. To everyone else who provided notes and ARC reviews on Goodreads. A special mention goes to the lovely Heather who provided the first review.

  Hugs all around for my family, friends, fans, and supporters for all you do and say to brighten my day and cheer me on. A thank you in advance for everyone reading this book or any of my stories anytime. You give me the encouragement to k
eep writing and I’m blessed to be able to have you around.

  I love you all!

  XOXO,

  Lilly Avalon

  About the Author

  Lilly Avalon writes new adult and erotic romances. She’s in her twenties and lives in a cute little apartment in a small city. She loves reading romantic stories as much as she loves writing them. Her favorite things include dancing, watching scandalous television dramas, and autumn. Lilly Avalon is a pseudonym.

  Excerpt from Here All Along

  Chapter One

  “I need a drink. Now.”

  After tossing—fine, throwing—my purse and keys on the couch, I march straight into the kitchen. No more delays; it’s time to forget tonight. It’s been yet another night like all the other first dates that never meet a second one. When you begin to lose count, that’s when it’s really time for a drink.

  Adrian stands there, leaning against the counter in an unbuttoned dress shirt and dark wash jeans. He glances at me as I walk in. “How was your date?” he asks, taking a swig of his scotch.

  I brush past him on my mission, opening the cupboard and moving a couple bottles around. I reiterate, “I need alcohol.”

  Out of the corner of my eye, I catch him hiding a smile before he says, “That bad?”

  My face twitches as I ignore his line of questioning. It is more like a statement he wants me to clarify, even though he already knows the answer. Instead, I ask, “I have vodka left, don’t I?” I stand on my tiptoes in hopes of spotting something in the very back. Nothing.

  He waltzes over and looks with me, his chin almost touching my shoulder. “I think you polished that one off after last week’s date.” His voice is low right next to my ear, very nearly causing a shiver.

  I let out a groan of exasperation as I recall that last drop of vodka. “Damn it!” It was the flavored kind, too. Adrian remembers everything. If he remembers the vodka, he probably remembers when I finished off the Kahlua the week before. It’s becoming a trend—a very bad one.

  Shutting the cupboard door, I spin around to face him, giving him a once-over for the first time since I got home. The fact that his five o’clock shadow beginning to show up more or less demonstrates his effort today. Tilting my head to the side, I ask, “What’s up with this?” as I touch his jaw line with my index finger. “And this?” I pinch the collar on his shirt. “Actually, I’m more surprised you still have your clothes on.”

  “It’s not like I walk around naked all the time.”

  “Almost naked.”

  “Hey,” he says, pointing at me sternly. “It was just that one time.”

  I bite my lip recalling that day I caught him walking down the hallway in just his boxers. I’d freaked out at first, but it was a nice sight now that I think about it. Very nice. “Maybe it was.”

  “I’m your roommate, not your boyfriend.” He touches a finger to my chin. “I make sure I’m decent in front of you until you say otherwise.” His smile morphs into a smirk.

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